Fortune's fool, fooling around.

The world of cinema has seen some great cinematic rivalries over the years: Robot vs. the Aztec Mummy, Ecks vs. Sever, Kramer vs. Kramer, Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus, Ladies vs. Ricky Bahl,  Godzilla vs. Kong, and now, at long last, Romeo vs. Juliet (2015).  

Our scene is not laid in fair Verona, however.  Instead, the film opens in a small village in Bengal, as the village elders hold a meeting for anyone with complaints against Romeo (Ankush Hazra).  It's mostly an excuse to harangue Romeo's mother Bidisha (Tulika Basu), as the assembled villagers point out Romeo's flaws - he's a liar, he doesn't measure up to his late and respected father, he's a bad influence on the other village youth, and everyone is pretty sure that it's Bidisha's fault.

For all his many flaws, Romeo is a devoted son, and he can't let anyone treat his mother that way.  He's still pretty flawed, though, so his solution is to try and win over the village elder's beloved niece, Shyamali (Neha Gupta.)  The plan works a little too well, with Shyamali announcing their engagement to everyone, and now Romeo has a different problem.

It's time for a new plan, and this one is even worse.  Romeo announces that he's in love with someone else, and when pressed he names Juliet (Mahiya Mahi), a beautiful woman living in London; Romeo and Juliet have never actually met, he just found her picture while scrolling through Facebook.  The villagers are suspicious, probably because Romeo lies so much,, so he must fly to London to bring back Juliet as his bride in order to protect his mother's honor.

In London he meets fellow Bengali expatriate Anu (Nita Mistry), and she agrees to help, which is just as well, because Romeo is utterly clueless.  It turns out that Juliet is an heiress, soon to be one of the richest women in London, so winning her heart is probably off the table, and instead they try and fail to get a picture of Romeo and Juliet together, because that way he can at least send something home.  

 However, in the course of wacky sitcom shenanigans, Romeo manages to save Juliet from a gang of assassins, because  village rowdies will always be better fighters than trained goons.  Juliet's father left behind a very specific and confusing will, stating that if anything happens to her before her twenty first birthday, his estate will be divided between the rest of the family, and she turns twenty one in two months, so she selects Romeo as her bodyguard, which means that he finally gets his picture.

He also has a chance to get to know Juliet while repeatedly saving her from assassins.  She's not the shallow rich girl that she seems, and they're getting along well, but he also learns that she has a boyfriend named Rahul (Joey Debroy), who is currently in America.  

And then Romeo gets another terrible idea: he'll take Juliet back to his village in India.  Dramatically that makes a lot of sense; it means that sophisticated city girl Juliet gets a turn as fish out of water, taking over for country bumpkin Romeo.  It means that Romeo and Juliet will spend more time together in a new place, and Juliet has a chance to grow closer to Bidisha, discovering the warmth of a loving family.  It means new locations for the fight scenes when the assassins inevitably show up.  But it also means a constant juggling act to keep Juliet and Bidisha from learning about Romeo's many, many lies, and I have to admit the cycle of "Juliet discovers a part of the truth and Romeo comes up with a new lie" gets a bit tedious.

There's a lot to like here.  Romeo and Juliet have some actual chemistry by the end of the movie, and both songs and fight scenes are frequent, visually interesting and move at a good pace.  But the plot really doesn't hang together, and the villain's plan makes no sense.

The big problem is Romeo himself, though.  He's supposed to be a charming scamp, but too much of the time he comes across as a smug jerk (especially when dealing with Shyamali.  And he doesn't really learn anything, because he never really gets any sort of a comeuppance.  When each lie is revealed, Juliet is mad for a while, but both she and Bidisha are quick to forgive, so Romeo doesn't really grow.  And he really, really needs to.